Just got my rental car in Iowa...gas is under 2 dollars in des moines...this is not a real state
Lets evaluate? U kissed one boss and lef twith another man. I cock teased the other, hardcore had a tongue jammed down my throat, made out w aa third then left in a cab w alex w them all yelling at me and offering rides. My cheek was also licked and bitten by 2 other men and we almost made out (u and me) because they asked. were hired.
just shaved my legs at the gas station bathroom before going to the club. is that too ghetto?
If I saw Perez Hilton naked I think I would stick a lit candle down my throat.
We did nothing beneficial to ourselves, or our country last night.
I'm currently trying to decide if crown or wild turkey will hurt worse coming back out through my nose later.
Stop trying to get a gf and raw dog some forest beasts like sasquatch
I didn't know where we were going to start fucking, so I just strategically hid condoms all over the house before he came over.
Yeah, my new jeep also came with custom license plates that read 4SKIIN. Not "4 skin" but "4 skiing" thanks mom and dad
He's the conductor of the struggle bus
I RODE THAT FINE PIECE OF STRUGGLE BUS
I wanted sex but got Ace Ventura: Pet Detective, instead. Then I had to drive 30 minutes home wet. Worst booty call, ever.
damnit. I just found my cousin on tinder.
I'm watching the World Cup in bed naked with john and our USA flag aviator glasses. Can you say America?
I found the guy I hooked up with last night on Wikipedia, at least now I know how old he is.
I think it's getting serious, we started a jigsaw puzzle together.
Randomize
