Yeah, but thats the third time she's peed on me.
With the way things had been going, I was never more excited for a person to cum
haha I love it when I find out that girls who were mean to me in middle school are now some random dude's baby mama. thanks, facebook.
I HAVE FLAVORED BLOW. THIS SHOULD NOT EXISIT.
czant get you from the arport. sry i found the rum. dan sucks at rumpong jusrt so yo knoqw.
God damn him and his understanding ways and little hip muscle things.
That's awesome and prob the first time you had an idea of what to do. I'm super proud of you Chelz
Its cos im stoned ! My high self is maturing
NO HOOKUPS IN THE CAR. I will try as i might to practice what i preach, but there are no guarantees.
We were supposed to hurry because the restaurant closed at 9. I ended up giving him a blow job so we had to eat at Arby's instead.
I only get hit on by people going through their midlife crisis. Yes, I did purposely write that gender neutral.
Is it inappropriate to match with someone on tinder just to ask if the friend in his profile picture is single?
I'm rolling and just noticed that the thread count on these sheets is horrendous.
A drag queen just ate a dollar out of my ass. I don't know which one of us has hit rock bottom
So... Sorry we took your wife to the strip club last night... And sorry we bought her that lap dance... I think you're getting closer to your dream of a threesome, though.
PSA. Do not shart while wearing a jock strap at work. That is all.
Randomize
