We were done making out and had been asleep for a hour. I felt him put his hand on my butt. Then I farted.
remember when jerking off was fun and not a neccesity
right before he came he said "im ganna fill your stocking" nothing like holiday spirit!!
You love me.
That's because, tragically, I adore whores.
I'm trying to find candidates for my winter break hook up. I'm going to hold auditions thanksgiving break.
My 19 year old brother just hooked up with his 45 year old cougar kindergarten teacher. These sorts of situations make me realize why the sorority girls call him Wondercock
Mistakes were made. Hot mistakes that I want to make again. But tapping your employee is def a mistake. Esp in front of two other employees.
also had sex in his sister's princess style bunk bed.
but you are a princess that one was appropriate.
i feel like i am made of mashed potatoes. i love cannabis pills so. fucking. much.
I really feel like I should slow down on the getting hammered. I told a bartender on "Taco Tuesday" that a $3 margarita was too expensive. And proceeded to have a $70 tab.
The other night he asked if I had a condom and I said I had an IUD. and he goes OMG A BOMB?
I asked to see his balls for medical purposes.
I don't know how much expertise I could offer. My best advice is, "don't drown, for god's sake don't drown"
My mom said "I saw the signs you guys were high, so I made the spaghetti"....so ya, I'd say she definitely knew
I mean, I'm not hammered, but I definitely can't show my face or tits in that bowling alley again
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