You screamed, "I am going to fuck this cheeseburger". They all started laughing until you actually started having sex with the cheeseburger.
vagina is talking i cant
You were pissed we didn't change the movie to Eurotrip so you kept singing "Scotty Doesn't Know" over and over until you passed out.
Between cock and motorcycle I'm glad I don't have to sit at work tomorrow
He let me keep his flannel as a "good job" for the great head I gave him.
She had the hiccups when she was giving me head. It was actually pretty awesome
high as fuck. watching parent trap with my mom. keep missing my mouth.
Out of desperation, I used the leftover sauce from my goat masala as a mixer for vodka shots.
do you know how ratchet you have to be to get kicked out of a drag club on Halloween weekend??
Dude. You stood in a corner laughing your ass off while folding clothes, facing the wall. Yes, they were weed brownies..
I think I just wanna go buy some jack at the liquor store, come home, take my pants off, and not give a shit about stuff
This heat and humidity do not mix with these braless DDs and a tank top at a BBQ.
all a girl really needs is a few good pair of leggings and a drug dealer that delivers.
Actually going to jail after your wedding is NOT part of the plan.
Give me the sexing that I truly desire and I will reveal to you the mysterious location of the PBR's
Randomize
