Lavender boy was great at seduction and crappy in bed.
sitting in class between the roommates of the two girls i fucked over break. this feels like a bad version of wife swap
I don't think a check that has "thx for the drugs" on the note is really gonna fly.
If we get out of this alive, I'm never going to a Denny's at 3 am again.
My name in their phones is "That Girl". If i can't get it to go away, I might as well live up to it.
he peed on his own floor last night after we left the bar. pretty much sums up how i feel about the evening
I have way too big of a thanksgiving food baby to enjoy any of my old high school booty calls
We were drunk having sex and I knocked over her bedside table/fish bowl and she jumped off to check if her fish was still alive but she made me pasta so it's cool
I climaxed at the same time the bass dropped. I think it's safe to say I've reached enlightenment
What am I even going to do with 20 more jello shots? And don't say give them to the cat
So far in 2016 I told someone id give them a blowjob for lasagna.
learned the hard way that breakfast jack daniels is a lot stronger than lunch or dinner jack daniels.
I do not love him. There is no love. Only sex and meatloaf.
He was my first marine! I wanna remember his name!
Justin has passed out on the toilet in a locked stall. Stay tuned for pics.
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