Come here. I'm drunk. Family Function. Intense Pro-life vs. Pro-choice debate. Bring Republicans.
He was sitting cross legged outside his tent repeatedly hitting the ground with a hammer and shouting 'this.is.a.good.idea.'
your facebook page is a work of drunk art.
its not thanksgiving till you and grandpa shotgun beers out in the shed, and lose
We lit firecrackers from NYE in the fireplace and he was so passed out that he slept through it.
I'd say the best part of the party was when you screamed to everyone that you were gettin dome on the reg
Dont eat ANYTHING off the floor at Matt's house. He likes floor sex.
I mean...he was throwing up for almost 3 consecutive hours. I don't think there's a chance in hell that would have tasted even close to tolerable.
I just really need to get the matching flask to go with my pill box. Is this another step towards rock bottom?
They turned motor-boating me into some kind of sick game
Steve called. He needs me to pick him up. He also asked for a set of his clothes, he can't find them. He is such a strong motivation to stay sober.
I think i should wear mittens next time we have sex.
I think I will always strangely appreciate as well as kick ass at stoned dishes. Like for the rest of my life. Thank you slave job at Starbucks.
Have I showed you the picture of my vagina with a little bang flag coming out of it?
And I am bleeding like slutty girl #1 In a horror movie
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