He saved me in his phone as Easy Jen. Should I be offended?
I wouldn't worry about it. He has me as "Sex Puppet."
I have a love/hate relationship when men come within a 10 minute time frame.
She's never had brie before last night, don't know if I can date a girl that doesn't like soft cheeses.
If a man's penis is referred to as "the family jewels" does that make a woman's vagina a jewelry box?
She said "I only hook up with guys I'm dating"
So... What happend then?
We dated for an hour, i broke up with her after. BOOM.
who do i root for if I want Christiano Ronaldo to win the world cup on a team by himself and then bang chicks on the pitch?
I am drunk at a castle and it isn't even 3. Europe is amazing.
I am currently google image searching dick piercings, trying to see what I'm getting myself into.
just found glitter in my belly button...seriously when will this nightmare end
WHERE ARE MY FUCKING EYEBROWS?!
You know those creepy dolls that look like they are watching you from anywhere in the room? It was like that, but with his penis...
I sincerely thought making it to McDonalds by 10:00am was a shoe-in but it appears that I need to adjust my zoom when looking at the map before walking to places.
I'm now having weird sexual fantasies about that riverdancing figure skater. So thanks for that.
You're like the fucking Mozart of sexting.
I never knew it was coming. He was cute and nerdy, cute and nerdy, cute and nerdy, and then BAM! Best hookup ever.
Randomize
