My relationship with VH1 is so bittersweet
You know your in college when you decide house chores with games of beer pong...
vodka and carrot juice, if im gonna drink i at least got my 8 servings of vegetable
You just kept saying "I want my babies to look like you."
he walked down the highway for 3 miles at 4 am, and got me coffee on the way. i dont think a blow job would have been enough.
Okay, we really need to start training for the St Pattys parade. 48 hours of green beer won't end well if we don't prep ourselves. 2 week bender starts now
Of course drinkings involved. They don't call it alcoholism because we eat too many skittles.
I want to figure out a way to work "if you suddenly die, I might turn into an extreme hoarders" into my valentines day poem
Fyi: beer caps are stronger then bathroom counters
Romney sounds like a middle school girl and that creepy ass smile makes me want to close my blinds
In my drunk state I was like I ONLY HAD SEX WITH SOMEONE ELSE BECAUSE HE WAS THE HOTTEST GUY IVE EVER EVEN SEEN
I'm like bob the builder except I'm fixing boners.
I want to start a guest book for my bed room so when dudes leave they can write a review
you gave me money for the cab and then walked home..
But I’m still curious to know... how did the homemade porno go?
Randomize
