this girl walked outta his room as i was walkin in to scottys and i just say " time for the walk of shame baby! whoooo!". she ran away
Apparently everytime he put me down to bed I escaped out the window, I faintly recall climbing into the canoe in the back yard, and air paddling.
i found the one person in the world who takes longer to cum than i do... mutual dissatisfaction is probably not the best foundation for a relationship.
i made potato chips in weed oil. what did you do today?
I just had to download an app to edit pictures on my new phone. The things I do for sexting...
I wish we couldve been like jesus and the desiples tongith
He probably has his cowboy hat on, that's his house hat.
i think maybe i'll just not watch it. i'd rather not think of you as a magical transforming set of dick holes.
He's an acquired taste, like S&M or those crunchy things they put in salads
Croutons?
And if I could both stabilize myself *and* pick things up with my penis... Well, I wouldn't be on the fire dept...
Besides you're a Tennessee fan and it'd be against my religion to have your penis inside me today.
Got stiff armed by the garbage man on the back of the truck...I just wanted to ride one block dude
Great news. Our sex broke my otter box
Right?? Give me some apple scented candles and I'm a fall wet dream
I know it's super late on a work night, but can you drop by and bend me over my new motorcycle? I have tequila and tacos...
Randomize
