I feel like Captain Hook just gave me a pap smear.
Does it still count as a "walk of shame" if it's only 1am?
even if everyone didnt know them screaming eskimo brothers and high fiveing over my head kinda gave it away
dear sober me, don't br the first to open the fridge in the morning
so this was truly a case of the blacked out leading the blacked out.
my life is one jail cell away from being a bad country music song.
haha it staarrted out with just getting drunk then it turned into sports authority. So now im 4th or 5th in line and shit faced. Help me
If it makes you feel any better, i gave her boyfriend a blowjob last week.
I didn't budget in chasers this month so were chasing everything with water. Sorry.
I have vomit stuck in my nose, you should come with a warning label.
Now that I'm born again, I'm preserving my gift.
Your vagina isn't a White Elephant gift. You can't re-wrap it after it's already been given several times. That's white trash thinking.
No. Mother. Fucking. Jello shots. Just no. I'm not falling into that trap again.
Yep that's the face of someone whose dick I would put in my mouth without hesitation
the party picked up after I got pretty drunk...I got kicked in the fucking head by a tiny lesbian...she was 5'1" I did not think she could do it...i was very wrong
My fuck it list is complete! I finally got a firefighter!
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