I caught a rooster roaming Edison Park then released it in the bar. They made me try to catch it again and somebody played the chicken dance while I chased it
the teacher just ate a hash brownie and passed out on the bus best field trip 2010'
no seriously. she's even got the premier of the real L word on her calendar at work. that lesbian.
Where can I buy a trophy for a Groupie Award?
She had sex with a merch guy. . . band guys make you groupies, Merch guys just means she's easy.
I'd like to personally thank you for not letting anyone puke in any of the salad bowls this time
He just came in my nostril. Never look down when a guy is pulling out during missionary.
i had confetti in my bra
i still find it in random places like a shoe or my car. that week haunts me
4 girls bringing me taco bell. this is what dreams are made of.
At what point in my life did a night that has strippers, belly dancers, tequila and a midget become "average"?
My sharpie cut off line was invaded last night. Where's my turtleneck?
You were outside cuddling a rock singing Bohemian Rhapsody.
My dad lost his bandaid somewhere in the turkey. It was a mixture of thanksgiving and an Easter egg hunt
Go makeout with Mickey Mouse so we can get FastPass tickets
I just chased my hot mailman down the street to ask him out and now I am 98% positive he gave me a fake number.
I flashed my boobs, shit my pants, and kissed the wrong twin. I'm on a roll you don't want in on.
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