He asked about stds. I told him I don't have any... which I don't. They are now called sti's. Whooopsie
she read insantiy as in-nast-tit-ty and asked what the hell does that mean...
I just made out with a girl with a life jacket on wtf is going on
I just want to go some place where I can have a nice night. Grind on men who speak no English, make out with a girl, and not feel judged.
i have a wrist watched drawn on my wrist that it says shot o clock
Make sure to show her the sewer we were arrested in on your tour.
He tried to bang a 300 pounder last night. No joke. I shotgunned a tall boy in a bar cuz the bartender didn't crack the beer. Cant wait till Nashville.
I peed glitter this morning and had a beard drawn on my face with eyeliner. Last time I do shots with gay Dan.
I'm alone drinking at the bar and the titanic theme song is on. This won't end well.
There are six slides. In going to pee in five of them. You have to guess which one to go down. Agree?
Agreed.
My parents heard us going at it in their tent. I told my mom it must have been a bear looking for food. I don't think she bought it. She deliberately chose this park because bears haven't been sighted here in years.
Yeah, so, that moment when the repair guy comes in and you see your cock ring on the counter one second before he does.
Why can I remember how tall Nicki Minaj is from looking up her height once months ago, yet after weeks into the semester I can't even remember where any my classrooms are located
Importance
You'll love it there. Trust me. Cheap tequila, pretentious beer, tall white guys who will treat you badly. Its got everything you like.
I'm just hoping that with all the times he's puked in my yard a mushroom field might grow.
Randomize
