Just saw actual Chinese people doing a Chinese firedrill. Good day.
Yeah but if I do that, I'd have to buy my own stomach pump for the house. That doesn't seem like a great thing to have sitting on the coffee table.
Everybody was literally kung fu fighting
He was so bad, he was dry humping me and his dick was nowhere close to my vagina.
i'm glad we've gotten to the point in our relationship where I can eat peach rings off your penis.
at least you got your priorties in line. new years first, than the baby.
Idk man I'm just a giant talking marshmallow ready to be toasted and dipped in chocolate
It's like we come as a package. Your slogan should be "be in my family, sleep with my roommate."
My slogan can be "bonding the family together. One dick at a time."
he just hooked up with some chick in a bedroom upstairs so I just went to sleep in the pantry closet...
Don't feel bad, we're professionals and we just housed burgers in burger king singing I believe I can fly
Going to the u of w I constantly have that moment of, oh hey I felt you up at that rave at folk fest that one time. Winnipeg is too small.
too bad we didn't bet. my 38-1 tears would have made great lubrication for a blow job.
Wish me luck. My vagina needs it.
May his noodley appendage touch you.
WHY THE FUCK DID I HAVE TO FALL IN LOVE WITH A CONVICT
I couldn't find a water bottle, so I sent her to school with her juice in a flask. Who the hell let me become a parent?
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