when a girl says 'did you just try to kiss me' you should leave the bar. trust me.
I don't care. He smelled like a fucking chilli cookoff
Look if you're not going to be mine and take care of my needs, I'm going to fuck your sisters.
You just kept walking around saying "my brain is soup" then sat on the kitchen counter washing your feet. You bit the guy that tried to help you down
Well you just missed the ten chi o pledges singing la bamba at our doorstep.
I hope your sleeping good cuz when u wake up im punching you square in the face
somehow I feel like "adventures with cocaine and molly" wouldn't be an appropriate "How I Spent My Spring Break" essay topic.
I wanted to make out with that blonde just so I could deck her boyfriend and make things interesting.
At least that would be something.
Eredayimstrugglin ..Can we talk about the fact that I just typed "er" and it autocorrected to that. Fuck my life.
I'm just wondering how Jon managed to get vomit ON THE CEILING?
My tits became the mascot for the SAE house last night.
What shade of lipstick clearly states, I'm only attending this wedding for the drugs and groomsmen?
Idk what's happening right now but im wearing a tutu and pissed as fuck.
He's UNCIRCUMCISED. And it curves. Two things I've never encountered in all my sluttiness and they're both on the hottest guy alive. :(
she crawled a good forty meters just to whisper in my ear... "dildon't"
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