Yeah i mean there's 3 guys fighting over me. It would just be bitchy of me not to get with at least 1.
i was so drunk that i ate a carrot out of her guiena pig's cage and thought it was normal
This unplanned pregnancy thing is really taking all the fun out of football season.
why dont you just whore around college until someone loves you...thats how it works for girls isnt it?
You threw a bottle at the bartender and then stole his tip jar. However, you were quickly KO'd by the bartender. Solid right hook.
Wow that was a lesbian tornado.
I just want to curl up with him and brush his hair and sing love songs together, I think you should come over and end this
Just proved I could salsa dance in a bar where no one was dancing
Sidenote...no idea how to salsa
pretty sure the dicks i sucked were punishment enough
First week back and I made to one class, its gonna be okay after all.
Hooker in the library. I repeat, we have a hooker in the library. This is not a drill.
My heart feels like a grape in a barrel about to be crushed into wine
I almost stopped mid bj to let him know I appreciated his balls being nice to look at/have my face near. But I didn't know if that would ruin, or improve the moment.
I'm her ex, so unless you're interested in her massive moral failings and open season vagina, I'm not your guy.
Finding my pants in the morning should not make me this proud
Randomize