I'm the only one here who isn't hooking up, coming out of the closet, or crying because of one of those 2 things.
My mind says no, but my body says yes.
What does your body say about chlamydia?
so I'm in athletic shorts, a suit jacket and I'm still drunk at 6:30am at the last leg of relay for life
after taking her first shot and having her first random hook up she finally feels like she is ready for college
she has no idea
His hands were made for my vagina.
I would like to apologize for making you the target of my "I wish head hair grew as fast as Pubes speech" the other night
Spent the entire ride home from downtown trying to convince designated dawgs to drop us off at waffle house instead of our apartment. i told them it was my house...they didn't buy it.
The $10 cab ride turned into a $60 cab ride when you puked down the back of his seat trying to whisper in his ear. He was a trooper though, he came into to wash off in the sink and still tried to get your number.
Yeah, you went up to him and said "I stare at people until they feel obligated to talk to me."
I'm not sorry for loving America more than everyone else
Maybe you should stop dating for awhile if the chicks aren't working out. Reacquaint yourself with your hand or something.
its 3am and I'm taking a bubble bath, this is what taking a day off work at 30 looks like
I was mad at him...then I jerked off. Now I'm over it. Orgasms fix everything, I swear.
What do you bring to an "I'm getting divorced party?"
.......Shattered dreams and tequila?
Can we skype so I'm not drinking alone?
Randomize
