Dork........ .......... .. . ...... ........... .. . ... ...... .. . .... ..... .. .... ... .......... .... . . ..... Yeah its morse code, no big deal
he asked me what things i liked that he did in bed, and i told him all the things i hated so he would use it on that new bitch and she wouldnt hook up with him anymore.
you for real need to get over him dude
the only human I can compare her to is rosie o'donnell.
Having skype sex with him in the lounge at 1:45am...THIS IS WHAT HE DOES TO ME
I think being a buddhist has made me a better drunk
I just figured out, there are 9 children in this world that I can look at in the face and say "I fucked your mom."
Oh and you pulled your pants down outside in front of like five people, held my hand, then peed.
when was she peeing in the stairwell? why dont i remember this?
....because generally we only remember 40% of the night each, and have to fill eachother in. And that still leaves 20% that we will never know and its probably for the best
after further investigation i found out he's a little bit married..
I don't know what's worse the the fact he has worn a protective cup for last 3 years in fear of being kicked in the balls. Or the fact that the one day he decides to throw caution to the wind and doesn't wear it and actually gets kicked in the balls.
Who in tha hell do u hang out with?
If she wants experimental lesbian sex, i call dibs
Well I'll be shitfaced all day the 4th in honor of this great nation... but I'm down for drunken camping/nature fucking on the 5th
I don't care if it's 2 inches or 20 I mean dick is dick
That dick was not the dick of a twenty year old
My Dachshund waddled into the room carrying a rolled-up pad in her mouth with period blood. This day is clearly off to a good start.
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