Me too!
i get tired of guys telling me there married or they have a girlfriend. they act like it concerns or matters to me
Can you put "designated driver" on a resume?
Turns out shot glasses hold the perfect serving of sour patch kids....I still fail to see how not having any real glasses is an issue
I really hope you are not drunk feeding a raccoon.
Which one of you fuckers thought itd be funny to see if the kitchen table can float.
I punted my pants across my apt at my roommate last night. Everything else is kinda fuzzy.
I feel like your personal Bdsm barbie...
If a clean cut ginger with a flannel and tattoos shows up at the apartment, he is allowed inside.
I'm done, I have no more memes or ways to ask for nudes, so yeah
We decorated the tree, drank wine, and he went down on me with Christmas music on in the background. Christmas IS coming.
friends who go to the bar together leave the bar together and im not leaving you behind ohana means family
Well, thanks for not letting me sleep with anyone, but no thanks for telling everyone I have the clap.
She dry humped my leg in the raw while I was still dressed, came, and then fell asleep on top of me. All I got was a bruised thigh. 2020 needs to end.
Looks like the opera singer hook up is paying off. Ran into the MILF from 407 and she said “your lady friend sounded like a very lucky girl.”
Randomize
