I'm getting drunk watching the disney channel. Is this a main reason why we aren't together anymore?
Wow anytime a scalper has i need tix written on the back of a franzia box thats a trusted seller
Calling yourself a modern day Geisha doesn't justify being a whore.
Well technically because of daylight savings, I only lasted 15 mintues.
I would like to apologize for making you the target of my "I wish head hair grew as fast as Pubes speech" the other night
I ended up staying at a police station for being a witness in a public masturbation case..NOW do you believe me that I've never had a good St. Patrick's Day?
could you please tell me why you thought vodka soaked band aids were a good idea?
I think he's in need of mouth to penis resuscitation. Which I happen to be certified
I was like a damn cattle dog, I separated all the sheep, I can wing man for anyone on this campus.
My liver is fucking rocky. Get knocked down 7 times and gets up 8. World champ
He kept saying I needed to go to the hospital and it just made me want to call him a pussy so I went to bed
I ripped off the screen and literally supermaned through my bedroom window. That wasted
WHEN YOU HAVE SEX WITH A GUY FROM A DIFFERENT COUNTRY YOURE SUPPOSED TO NEVER SEE THEM AGAIN
I'm assuming you were here at some stage because I woke up alone, clean and in a towel with mum asking my why my shoes, dress and jewellery were in the bottom of the shower.
That married penis I’ve been riding offered to pay off my student loans. I was going to break it off because he has lousy stamina. Is being debt free worth putting up with mediocre sex?
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