the fundamentals of my vasectemy are strong
i just won a 100 dollar gift card to walmart in a karaoke contest...i love kentucky
He came in the heat vent in my car. Don't ask how it happened.
I want to leave work and go home and eat Five Guys and masturbate
i woke up to my roomate hitting me in the head with a can of PBR at 8:30 in the morning...i love spring break
They were going around the house breaking things and screaming "Not my house!"
I opened my package from my mom today. She put four bottles of tequila in the bottom under my ducky slippers. She knows me way to well.
Dude if it is ever said "everybody get inside the police helicopter just showed up.". That means it was a successful party.
and I think you ate the old crusty spaghetti on the counter when we came home last night judging by the carnage
how many times have i told you.. they dont like when you laugh during sex
Amazon.com "suggested" I buy both nipple clamps and opera gloves.
Because I'm currently dying, lacking waffles, and vaguely convinced I'm an eagle
I've been sleeping with the same person for about two months now, I think I know a little bit about stability and commitment.
He showed up on school grounds wearing nothing but a suit of armor. Really at this point I'm more impressed than angry.
Will exercising make me less horny?
Randomize
