she went to pee and i could hear her singing "Drip Drip Drop LIttle April Showers" from Bambi through the door.
Everytime I think about NYE, my gag reflex kicks in.
just puked in a purse in the store. some girl asked if i was gonna buy it now and i laughed and asked her why id want a bag some dude just puked in. her face looked like she saw the devil.
We were making out and then he stopped and said to me, "Your ship is right there, why don't you take your people and just go?"
I just sniffled when I woke up and got a bump of coke. I have never felt so good hung over.
I think it was the free bomb shots from the creepy bolivians that sent us over the edge
think of it as grooming, as if he is my Kate Middleton and I'm grooming him to be a presentable princess
We got the DJ into it too! "If there are any dudes into other dudes out there, my man mark is looking to get pounded. Buy him a drink stat!"
Totally forgot we howled at the full moon last night... It's safe to say Tuesday Boozeday is my new favorite day of the week
Still stoned. I like your bong. It can stay. No others, though.
I'm going to avoid eye contact because my old high school English teacher is not who I feel like seeing after I just had a dick in my mouth
My liver can't handle being unemployed!
I'm not a morning person, and, trust me, no matter how good your cock may be, it will not turn me into one.
I’M DRUNK AND EXCITED.
I came twice and when I was done I petted his head and said "you did good kid you did good" and just laid back smiling. Tell me I'm not awesome.
Randomize
