absolutely 100% incorrect. and i love you more you silk skinned goddess
I walked into cold stone and the guy started preparing a supersized birthday cake remix for "Mrs. Munchies"
There's a sucker born every minute but swallowers are harder to find.
So glad I found your sister.
based on the size of her vibrator, i'm going to be a huge disappointment
You just kept rubbing her head and repeating "I really like your head, I want your head..." over and over for like 10 minutes straight... And she didnt even stop you.
She told me to stay away from him cause apparently he fucks anything that walks. clearly i responded with..."i walk"
My doctor literally wrote on the script NO SEX
Of course he wants me there for his birthday. If a girl offers you a blowjob for every year of your life, you're gonna want her to be there.
Some girl, somewhere, is going to wake up with my face paint on her vagina
Nothing is more important than the last pool party of the season. Call in sick or gay or something.
You are right. The scrape marks on her ass are from her breaking the doggy door by crawling through it.
THERES A BEAVER CHASING ME, ANGRY BEAVERS IS FUCKING REAL DUDE
hey can you come unlock the basement door? I'm trapped in here.
no I can't, you're a safety hazard. but, there's a beer keg down there somewhere. we don't have cups, but help yourself.
I'll give you another blowjob if you bring me some cake.
I’ve looked at so many mouse vaginas in the past week
Randomize
