shes still asleep dad put a lobster in her bathroom
I don't even know. I woke up to a text from someone named Vick saying he was 'legit worried' that I had herpes.
Idk, it's Grover wearing a sombrero. Do I need a reason?
You know when you can feel the alcohol in your toes? That's a great feeling.
I'm sick of being the only unemployed member of the group. Doing things alone isn't partying. Its sad.
What a dumb baby whore.
I was taking a bath while he walked in, sat down on the toilet, and said "its like a baby, I can see it crowning."
All I really remember is thinking that the music looked like beautiful lizard waves in my head
You know you have done too many drugs when you gum the sugar off your margarita without even thinking twice
you don't go into accounting for the pussy....
He shit in the fireplace
Can I make sure all my sluttiness goes to you when I die? You're the only person I know who'll make use of it
The next morning I found her spread eagle asleep on the living room floor and he was asleep with his head in her crotch. I needed a ride and had to wake them up.
im pretty sure i tried to use axe body spray to cover up the strong urine smell coming from my jeans. im also pretty sure that it didnt work.
Trust me, I’ve got a sixth sense about dicks that tells me if a guy knows how to fuck and it’s tingling. You need to prove me right!
I’m not going to bang him just to confirm your Dickth Sense
The Dickth Sense!!! I love it! It’ll be our first porno!
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