12 pack with dinner. Living by yourself is awesome.
the only girl from my high schools graduating class coming to our school next year went stag to prom and still has braces...
dibs.
so he shaved. down there. and before he took his pants off i thought it was hot but then all i could think about were the naked mole rats from 7 grade science class.
i was so drunk i stopped mid-blowjob to make sure he i was with my boyfriend and not some random. twice.
Its piss that you smell... I borrowed that shirt last week. Sooo, wanna grab some laundry soap on your way home? And good luck on your date.
WAIT U DIDN'T FEED THE SQUIRREL?
we just finished making mockaritas... then we prayed
god you guys know how to party
worst. bachelorette party. ever.
Dude turns out her best friend is lesbian...there is no wingman for this situation
The toilet started ringing, I think I just found your phone.
Well regardless of which drugs we choose to do tonight until four in the morning, we are having a wii bowling championship. So choose carefully.
July 5th AKA Day of regret AKA picnicing in a laundromat. Someone puked allover the comforter. Liffe of champions.
I think they make you graduate because you get too old to go hard and become a risk. homecoming weekend wins again. fuck.
He kept walking up to every girl at the party saying "Hi, I'm George Clooney. No I won't marry you." He left with three girls.
I never thought I would have to put a band-aid on my penis.
Unfortunately the rum ran out midway through our viewing and we had to suffer in silence for the rest of it.
Randomize
