Chill out big head. its weird when girls look at dudes asses
I tried to give up sex for lent. It feels weird that on easter I'm this excited to be a whore again
Ninja stars and alcohol are a bad combo
Just smoked a bowl with the exterminator. I think my day is more productive.
the first sign of life we got from you was four hours later. you smiled without opening your eyes when tom whispered in your ear we were getting buffalo wings.
When she talks to me all I hear are 5 generations of inbreeding speaking.
She was kinda cute. So long as you don't mind neck tattoos and bad life choices.
Pavlovs bj experiment 2012. Welcome to the program.
He is dating a girl who is on the Olympic shooting team...I've never been so scared to hit on a guy with a girlfriend in my entire life.
dude, where are you? this beer run has taken so long i read war and peace, took a nap, and shaved 3 times.
Oh and Dustin informs me I'm a legend amongst the freshman, if you were wondering about my street cred
I just need to find a good handlebar mustache to sit on until I'm over that beard
Yeah, so, that moment when the repair guy comes in and you see your cock ring on the counter one second before he does.
Blame the bisexuality and move on?
i got drunk and started dancing with the plant because you were out of town
Randomize
