Dear everyone that texted me last night wondering where i was. i ended up face down blacked up drunk before i made it to the party. My bad
So I got hit on by a gay guy. It might have something to do with the fact that I licked his nose.
And why did you do that?
Tequila
Myspace is for pedophiles and tweakers in the 818 trying to hook up. I always forget theres music there too
my brother is about to go smoke a joint outside... he's preparing his munchies on the counter beforehand. I admire his responsibility.
Well, at first I was really confused. But then I realized that he was talking from his penis's perspective... in third person.
If I die tonight. Just know that chicken I made fuckin ruled. Recipe: Chicken with a shitload oF spice
she made sit in a corner, drink nothing but water and told me she was worried about me because i picked up an irish guy at a taxi rank. says the girl who invented tequila night and fucked a guy in a park across the street from a sweet sixteenth.
We have such limited time together he literally sends me text messages that are like "I sent my roommates on an impossible quest, we have 15 minutes." it's that bad.
Itd be nice if there was a level of interest in me somewhere in between the indifference and obsession that I've only been attracting
jesus, I think that canada gold metal game has completely changed all rules of acceptable drinking habits, I was fucked untill noon and I just got invited to go party when I get off work...at 600am...and NO ONE understood why i was hesitant
he gave me a flinstones gummy vitamin and was like, "ya know.. because of ebola."
I feel like I should be having more sex dreams of my boyfriend than his sister..
I have alotted at least an hour for ugly crying.
Realization: many of my behaviors would lead to me being stoned to death in a lot of foreign countries. God bless America.
Our love of vodka is more proof than a maternity test
Randomize
