Dude, I don't think I'll ever be able to find a girl for me...
Is this the gay conversation?
Hey baby girl when you gonna let my tongue get up in that ass like i'm an explorer trying to go deep under on a quest for the lost city of atlantis
your text was fucking rediculious. Will let you eat my asshole though.
just put cider in my bong. gotta love fall
the 24 hour champagne diet aint going so well
Not sure if jager bombs can cure tuberculosis, but its a theory im testing as we speak
No, he's ok. He just broke his teeth on the stripper pole. No biggie.
welp wont be popping out a kid with a beret. frenchie is gone and the mother nature showed herself. bilingual kid can be erased from the bucket list
I feel like my chances would have been better if I hadn't told her "I need to fuck you before you leave."
Btw. U, me, male strippers, beer. Gonna happen. We could totally get TNT from like u know TNT places
Can you plz delete the video of me twerking in Waffle House, my mom just got a vine.
I woke up with what appeared to be LSD in my pocket. Know anything about this?
I want to start a guest book for my bed room so when dudes leave they can write a review
Slammed 3 beers and just bowled a 129\nI guess alcohol IS the answer
I'm going to smell of sex and shame.
How is that different than any other Monday night?
I just walked across town, stoned off my ass and barefoot in 35 degree weather for him to bust five mins in and then apologize 13 times as I got dressed.
Randomize
