somehow, due in part to drug cocktail and alchl prior to meeting, i blacked out, got home, made total mess of kitchen, broke shower, and made 17 hard boiled eggs
i just wanna soil my oats bro
I was in the bathroom throwing up...when I walked out he was sitting there watching porn and jacking off. He said, "Sounded like you were gonna be in there for a while."
Well, I guess that settles the question of how thick the walls are in my building.
The baby slept soo good last night. Its like he knows the importance of me being intoxicated all weekend.
i'm only riding in the trunk because they put the case of beer back here..
I'm like a savant for remembering names I learned while I was drunk. Seriously, I'm three for three. I'm on a roll.
wrestling a boy for fruit? sounds suspiciously like foreplay...
It'd probably just be a lot of profanity and hyperventilation and deteriorating into tears anyways
so just a regular conversation then
idk about you, but when i sext i just hit em with the "yo lets bang" text
He legit watched "Cops" the entire time he was fingering me.
Named all the presidents in order between puke sessions while semi conscious so that's a thing I can do now
There's a fine line between kinky and serial killer
So if you wanna come get your pants you can. But you have to come in your boxers. Rules are rules!
Thinking and hoping ice cream is the answer to my problems
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