I haven't had sex in so long I'll probably find some stranger, feel guilty, go w/o sex for several months and do it all over again...always something to look forward to
we should go somewhere reaaaaaal shady
I started the year with 2,800 dollars and am now down to 83 dollars-one of which i use to snort my focalin. I have given up on food and am perplexed as to how I can make 82 dollars last more than two weekends for booze
He has crabs, not bed bugs. I recommend incoporating a clinic on this mornings walk of shame route.
Two things. 1 - I want to apologize for my drunkeness last night. 2 - I want to pre-apologize for my anticipated drunkeness tonight.
No. And Marissa said shitting in the handicap bathroom at work does not get you into the club. You have to shit yourself. She said.
They have a booking log online so i can just check that instead of call
Technology: making bailing your sister out easier since 2008
I was the girl at the bar last night passing out free condoms and making sure everyone knew how to use them to keep the population down
Say what you will, but only I can throw up on someone's door and make it look like art.
That's the last time I'm letting you drink that apple vodka
Shirley Temple died. We owe it to her to get dirty shirley wasted.
pretty sure I blew his mind with the sex last night. He repaid me with a five minute conversation about power rangers.
Sigh. I'll find the right guy one day.
Prince charming is right around the corner and will be freaky as shit!
He has no idea I'm scrolling through Instagram while he's going down on me. I'm so bored.
Why is there a horse in the backyard?
I stayed at my gfs last night. This is all on you.
well i can officially check "have sex in a prius" off my bucket list...
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