If it were my dying wish, would you come over 2nite 2 save me?:):):) wana come anyways?
I wonder how skeet ulrich feels about the skeet skeet phrase and and what it denotes.
i was so high last night while i was driving i felt like i was riding a bike with no pedals
Peed in a church parking lot last night. As if Jesus didnt hate me enough already.
Improvement. She went from pretending she was the soccer ball in the world cup games and it hurt when they kicked her to passed out on the floor.
i have now been nicknamed the screamer on the first, third, fourth, & six floor by all the ra's. only two more floors to go before i cover the entire dorm.
Judging by my dry clothes and wet sheets, I think I might have gotten out of bed, pissed ON it, covered it up, and passed out on top of it
If a man doesnt have the ability to fuck you well on a small climbing wall, I don't think he deserves you.
she brought my homemade cookies with condoms taped to the box... im in love
He's slurring his text. I didn't think that was possible.
I'm gonna die. First I'm gonna throw up. But then I'm gonna die.
I just put on lipstick to sext him. That should tell you where my love life is at.
I'll never lecture you, go get that dick baby girl make momma proud,I didn't raise no quitter
Of course the sales lady was judging you, you bought a pregnancy test, ky jelly, diet pills and a 6 pack of red bull. Even i'm judging you.
You were sober bartending last night right?
Sorta. I remember you crying, ripping rose petals off the flower stem and slowly sprinkling them behind the bar at me and singing softly
Romantic
Randomize