She came back in her actual cheerleader uniform. Made a bad bj tolerable.
I don't know what you're talking about. I just drank beer out of my own bellybutton by doing a backbend and letting it run down my body.
There's a drag queen here that reminds me strongly of you. You should try crossdressing.
Then you bent down and whispered, "excuse me mr. Stair, could you please stop moving?"
Ya know what's been the best part of this College Football Season? Not having to hear Brent Musberger say the Honey Badger 77 fucking times.
It is no longer St. Patrick's Day. I should NOT still have green boobs!
she got the mcdonald's logo tattooed on her ass. sober. yesterday at noon.
Adulthood is making your own puke bucket.
I just did a walk of shame on my own block. one of the old neighbors saw and greeted me "good morning, girl next door"
Let's just say it was like a porno version of Aladdin....
For not being a nurse or a sex worker I have seen an alarming amount of penises.
How am i even supposed to meet his daughter? "Hi, Claire, I hear we have so much in common, like we both love your Dad and also we're almost the same age."
Pretty sure we had a civil war reenactment in your kitchen at 4am.
That would explain the cannon.
I have sent texts to the pizza delivery guy telling him he was beautiful. Oh and you almost got a ticket for pissing in public. And I smell like cheese.
On cleanup... i've counted 94 solo cups so far.. oh, and i found a miniature top hat in the microwave
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