Hold on, I gotta pump breast milk for the white russians.
He was in Alberta for less than a week and is already banned from 6 bars. I fear for his general well-being over there.
The bouncer called to give me my shoes back when I got there he said " I'm all cool with fuvking bitches but when you try to to do it in my bar on the pool table you're gonna get chocked out every time"
At least you got your shooes
I gasped. Both pairs of lips did.
Someone broke into my car and stole it then left me $300 to pay for the damages with a lovely note that said "we just couldn't pass up the boxed wine... Sorry about the window."
I'll come hang out with you guys later, but right now my parents aren't home and I have to take full advantage of being able to watch porn on full blast.
Hopefully this dress says "let me rent your house" and not "let me suck your dick for money"
My buddy just got straight up kicked out of the bar on my bday for water boarding people with beer and bar towels
Holy sore nipples Batman
In retrospect i can confidently say that the last two months of our relationship... i was only in it because i didnt wanna lose my list on his netflix account.
Oh I fucked him, definitely. We played Strip Halo.
I haven't answered because I haven't figured out a polite way of saying fuck no
I don't want to date him...I just want him to cheat on his girlfriend with me.
A true gentleman never tells. But yes, I did indeed get laid last night
There were a lot of gay moments in between the Strippers and coke
Randomize
