just apologized to a random stranger while waiting in line for coffee. last night was that drunk
I just opened a gallon of milk that is good through the 10th of January- I hope I can say the same for myself.
And then she proceeded to fling her bra around while screaming the rocket power theme song, still managing to not fall off the skateboard
i mean, we fucked on the futon in the garage where his band practices. pretty sure im now obligated to like his band on facebook.
He woke up in the ambulance thinking he was still in the club.
Somehow me showing up to/breaking into her house only to find I was a week early for the party became a night of weed cookies and sex.
Your never gonna wash that desperation outta that sweatshirt you know.
Well there's nothing more unattractive them a naked, soft man crying
Oh good your over him
Keep it up. It gets easier when you turn 21. Something happens in people's brains when they turn 21 and all of a sudden you have the power to drink constantly and abuse drugs and still graduate with good grades and your shit together. Im almost positive I read it in my freshman year bio textbook
I'm watching my cat lick a used condom wrapper on my nightstand and I'm too hungover to move and do anything about it. Tequila Tuesdays can not be a thing.
Okay well we need to be adults. We're gonna end up with diabetes or some shit.
well smoking weed has become a deal breaker for me so I pretty much use "let's go smoke a blunt" as an icebreaker
And here I thought that was one nut sack too many
Like I'm not tryna become president or marry a doctor or some shit here, like one level above garbage is all I'm asking for
he told me that he only likes small dogs. I should have known he was going to end up being little bitch.
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