u cheatin on me?
if i did i would try to upgrade babe.
so tomorrow. i'm thinking coinstar then adderall?
my lips still taste like vagina
so you liked breakfast?
ehh, still wish we woulda went to IHOP instead
When are you freeeeeeeeee?
My phone auto corrected that to freeeeeeeeeedoooooooooom. That's kinda awesome.
is it normal that we went to that class once and both got 100's on the final? ohhhh, arizona state.
trying to figure out who visited the hillshire farms website enough for it to be in my top sites.
I woke up wearing just my underwear and a headlamp at a different house than I remember passing out at. I told you irish car bombs are not made with an entire guinness.
Dude, I swear her tits are going to give me a concusion.
HE HAS A CHODE. LIFE IS NOT GOING TO BE EASY FOR HIM.
Shes sitting on the front porch puking in to the pumpkin she just carved...in the rain. I guess pumpkin spice tequila shots wasnt our best idea.
We now only communicate via Xbox messages. Living together is so easy
Jesus himself couldn't make a better sandwich
You have 4 bottles of kahlua in ur drawers but no sox
Caitlin, you were laying in your bed feeding your dog ritz chips and singing a whole new world at 4am loud enough your neighbors came over an asked you to stop.
I love my life
it’s about to be september and all i keep thinking is what if i go (another) full calendar year without having sex?
Randomize
