i wouldnt be suprised if in indian your name meant "walking lie"
so are u like ashamed lol?
not really. i dont look at it as being homeless. im just going to pretend im on an extended camping trip
doooooooo herrrrrrrrr
I'm out of practice. be my yoda
put your penis in her you must.
Yeah, we spent most of the evening making fun of the drunk girl until we realized it was you.
Watching intervention at a bar. Who let this happen??
Woke up to the sound of my own moans coming from the tv....evidently it was videotaped.
We just ended up getting drunk and doing field sobriety tests on each for practice... No one remembers who passed.
The least you could do before I go into your room is throw away the condom wrapper from the other girl I know you're banging.
He said he actually "met" me for the first time through a picture his housemate had of me, drunk and passed out in a pool of my own vomit, on the floor of his basement.
he went down on me to a drake song and now i think i need a penicillin shot
I like how she'll post a picture on Instagram with her boyfriend and 2 hours later you'll send me a snap of her panties on your rear view mirror
She just asked me if I was going to stay the night. I responded "I know that we are upside down".
The last thing I remember is talking to the firefighter next to me and he was giving me fruit.
You pee in parking lots....i drive home naked.....thats the american dream i was promised
I now have scissors specifically made for cutting dicks off.
Randomize
