so the guy behind me in court for my DUI hearing got a DUI on a lawnmower at 1AM...he is my new hero
Dont you think its a little early in the relationship for sexting?
got a scholarship and a hot psych teacher. hello spring 2010
it's like doing a sit-up... but, you're inside someone
just found $310, wrapped in a rubber band, at the bottom of my sock drawer with a note attached stating, "Make it rain".
He was pretty wasted I guess, but the crippled guy threw the first punch it was awesome
I was preparing to do my walk of shame shirtless, but then I found my sweater, wallet and keys neatly piled under a tree in the park.
At first i thought she was a sexily dressed toddler. but not in a pedophile way, in a really on drugs way
youre always welcome to strip dance on tables with me Mag. what are friends for.
I went to the bar saying i wasn't going to drink that much. I forgot sobriety might as well be some mythical creature when you're with Holleey
She told me to pick her up in the corner of shame and self-disgust.
That was so not worth putting pants on for.
Is there an "I fucked your brother" emoji?
It's gonna be me and some oreos tonight. Basically like sex
I honestly think sometimes all you need is a $2 alcoholic punch poured from a jug into a big glass to feel better. I guess abblebees is my new problematic fav
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