Please advise as to how precisely ashamed I should be if I just became sexually aroused by a Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince preview
The weird kid in front of me is reading an article titled "why don't i have a girlfriend?" the article then continues to talk about the mathematical equation for obtaining a girlfriend. exhibit a of why he is single
So I had to explain to her that pussy doesn't mean a cat
He crawled over to me grabbed my boob asked me if I liked cats and then passed out. If that's really my RA, it's gonna be a long year
We realized tonight that we have to get advice about guys from you because you're our only straight male friend that neither of us has slept with.
We are gunna have the best winter break smoking weed and eating ham
My mom just told me the story of how she met my dad through prison. How was your saturday?
Plus he stuck it in when you were sleeping which would have been the tipping point for me but you art school kids are all liberal and shit
Btw, if I didn't have 3 limbs in restraints and my free hand offing myself with the pocket rocket, I would have snap chatted you. Next time.
The resort was totally empty, just June and I. Which of course lead to EXCESSIVE day drinking and outdoor fucking. FYI Dominicans LOVE to watch.
If I had a vagina, my apartment would have been the Atlantic
She was from Wisconsin, she had great boobs... I mean... It's a dairy state....
I literally just told you I found out I masturbate in my sleep. I think we can be snapchat friends again
They were out of watermelon smirnoff, so we got you a fifth of 5 o'clock and an actual watermelon.
I might be a bit longer... I found a hot guy at the grocery store, so I'm following him and buying stuff that he's buying
Randomize
