so he came in my eye... should i throw out my contacts?
he just kept saying that he had liquor dick..then he tried to fuck me without removing his pants.
four loko is apparently banned in the us. so i think its time for us to stock up. i already emailed them about buying them in bulk
Last night I dipped into my beer fund to pay for groceries. SINCE WHEN ARE MY PRIORITIES SO WHACK???
You "were" hungover, which is past tense. So that gives you no excuse not to go out tonight.
Basically I learned last night that if you're too polite people will think it's okay to play with your nipples when really its not even a little okay
My time here is complete. I think I have now thrown up in every major degree programs building
Is the party worth it?
I am drink. Beer pony and singing.
Can you please explain to me why there are 7 bags of tacos in my bed?
I woke up with a dick pic from the ex-Mormon via email. Not really what I wanted to see before my first cup of coffee this morning, but I gotta say, I'm impressed.
My manager said you offered to make out with him to ensure I keep my job if I didn't show up to work today
I'm going to bed early so football can come sooner
If you don't see me at the bar tomorrow night, I was most likely captured by the communists.
I forgot to tell you that he serenaded me with "Fuck Her Gently" by Tenacious D. And I didn't hate it.
he told me he wanted me to go see his cat. apparently i was more interested in playing with his cat then having sex.
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