OMg patrick swayze is the sexuest man he is killing me I'm gonna get dehydrated if I don't stop looking at him
And I just remember seeing him for the first time and being like, who is this ape of a man? Like legit he could be the missing link
i would never do something against you youre the best i ever had
please tell me you did not just intentionally quote drake..
I knew something was wrong when santa got arrested
I'm on page 4.
Im on beer infinity
she read insantiy as in-nast-tit-ty and asked what the hell does that mean...
You know... If I put the same amount of effort into school as I put into giving women orgasms I would be a Rhodes scholar
Some great men died of syphilis. I accept your compliment.
No, I got those cupcakes fair and square. That homeless man should have known not to underestimate the determination of a stoned chem student.
I am trying to think of a way to tell him about thanksgiving and the following weekend in a way that makes me sound funny and exciting and not like an alcoholic
first time i ever mailed panties back to a fuck buddy. what better of a way to say its over
im mad at you for telling me he ejaculated during "let it go." Thanks for ruining the song forever.
Would I be a horrible mom if I got a babysitter at 6am so I could go get laid.
Oh man
I hooked up with the lead singer of the band at the wedding. I am so hungover.
Just because you can't have him, doesn't mean you can have his brother.
What about the best friend?
Randomize
