If that was your dad, he is hot
He is such a gentleman, he paid for my plan b
the beds are so narrow its like a jenga threesome
what if cement was really a rainbow color they just secretly paint it grey so as not to distract drivers
are you high?
I just asked the bartender if I could get insurance on my drink in case I spilled it.
We play this game where we catch up on what we missed over five years of not talking to eachother, then we have sex like nothing ever happened.
Halfway through the blowjob she stopped and said 'Wait I know this dick'.
Cheez-its and a bottle of cab...for under $10 you could win this girls heart
I better not get a vid of you penile helicoptering
All I'm saying is that if you have time for a 20 min shower bj you have time for me
I feel like I put a fire out with my hand but idk if that was a dream or not
He had a clap on lamp. So every time he was ramming into me, the lights kept turning on and off
Good luck. While you're suffocating on a dick, I'll be eating pizza rolls. Being a good girl.
Well I just woke up to no pants, Gatorade on the headboard along with an uneaten steak, and the instinct I was a giant asshole.
Divorce can be hard, but look on the bright side. Your soon to be ex raved about your dick and I’m great with hard things ;-)
Randomize
