Our friend ended up naked, bleeding, requesting we throw a couch at him cause he was convinced he could block it
We did he did.
When I say naked, I mean penis exposed. Not in boxers
he started yelling "this is my pussy" mid thrust
i blew a .213 what kind of thug blows the compton area code exactly? this guy
is it weird that i feel like i won the break up because my status change got two comments and his got zero?
There's nothing worse than waking up naked on the beach covered in sand and a family walking by.
If you're trying to piece together your night, I can tell you where those tassels came from.
I'm slightly possesive over the gucamole when i'm stoned.
Is that why you left peanut shells in my bed?
my revenge plans when i'm high are never as good as i think they are
U were yelling that I wasn't generous or supportive. Then you kneeled and said this weird prayer about the windows and doors of your life.
Her roomates have been scoring her hookups. I got 8.9, best of the week!
googling pictures of Lindsey Lohan so that I know what to wear to court is definitely a low point in my life
I think Facebook knows you fucked me. All of a sudden I get everything you do in my news feed.
Marrying her is the worst scenario of any. That includes death and zombies.
Molly I still can't believe u puked in that guys hands and still got laid
I know this shouldnt be a problem, but there are too many women hitting on me. I dont know what to do
We're pretty sure we got naked at Pride, so running the two blocks to your place in my underwear is a step up the dignity ladder really.
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