ugh, today is just one of those 'get high before your 8am class' days.
Then he told me he was 40. I'm not sure if I have enough Daddy issues to go for it
I just had a librarian tell me that "wikipedia is like sex"
When he expanded on the analogy it actually made sense. "you're going to do it either way, so I'm just going to tell you how to do it safely."
so yeah i told her you were going to become a doctor and the first thing she said was "i still don't want to fuck him". i tried.
I've been crying in my room listening to Billy Joel for 2 hours. Thank God Four Loko was banned.
He made me a period mix..should I back out now?
You screamed for campus security to do something about the police officer who dumping ur 40
It's like she can't drink without using a flambongo
I was having trouble getting it up so she grabbed it and said "no, it's too big to fail"
you walked in on him eating me out and screamed SHE'LL BREAK YOUR HEART BRO before body slamming on the ground and passing out on the floor
do you ever feel so high you're swimming backstroke and then you realize you're still laying in bed on tumblr
But seriously. What possible excuse could I come up with to ditch my parents on Christmas to go fuck him?
I didn't want to see any of his nipples and now I've seen all three. Thanks.
We were supposed fuck one time, but ended up fucking for 2 years.
he tried to have the "are we in a relationship" chat last night. I stuck my fingers in my ears, yelled lalalalalala very loudly at him and told him I would stop having sex with him if he ever tried that conversation again. bad person, or just being a realist?
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