He kissed my cheek and I could smell it the whole way home like shit
I definitely didn't wake up this morning thinking "i wanna get gang banged today"
I am at 2.05 miles in under 11 minutes. So either this thing is broke or I should always work out wasted.
Drunk on Tuesday. Double fisting. Mmmbop is playing. Only girl in the group. Life is complete.
dude. this chick is staring at me like i gave her brother herpes.
I'm with Tony. He said he volunteers his ball sack for waxing but you will have to wait a few weeks. It is a freshly shaved sack. I guess he thought he was gonna get lucky. Wtf?
Smooth sack
I'm trying to convey to the smoking hot Spanish cleaning lady at work that I want to bone her but I think it's getting lost in translation. How do you say "blowjob" in Spanish?
Also, what is a socially acceptable way to introduce a crossbow in public?
Bullets don't scare me. I wish I was a coyote
just once I'd like to not pass out before we leave the designated pre-drinking place
sometimes it's just necessary to be your own gyno when you're too afraid to tell your mom about your real life
If Boring and Monotone had a love child, it would be this guy.
This morning, I found 5 naked people in Steve's bed with post sex hair, and Steve fully clothed sleeping on the ground.
Dude i woke up today by a pile of fried chicken and wearing a bra
.......stop going to frat parties....
In honor of Randy Savage we're wearing spandex and handing out slim jim's with option to suplex. Get behind it
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