I painted my nails silver
And what are the implications of that?
Is there supposed to be a msg in that? Just thought ud like to know it looks like I fingerbanged an alien
Dude judst bought snd smokked tfour white widoew jointsd in Asmsterdam. Wstching the Cvhiefs gsme. Oh Boy.
You are why other countries hate Americans. But I say God bless you.
This lady in my dui class just asked what patron was. I feel like she doesn't belong here
For my job application I just put "community gardener- personal business" for my previous work experience in place of the neighborhood pot grower/distributor
Both his mom and his sister were hitting on me when I stopped by today. He isn't a real friend anyway, right?
Well if you're drunk enough to make some mistakes this week I'd be down to redeem myself for my poor performance.
We haven't even scratched the surface on the damage we could do. Just saying
I woke wondering who the hell was in my bed. Then i felt boobs and remembered Haha. Thirsty Thursday killed my liver and my homosexuality
I'm sorry but the visual image of you suffocating on vagina is basically hysterical
I just wanna be able to fart and do my homework but he won't leave
The Stanley Cup Final is killing me. I can't go to work drunk again.
I sharted in my christmas pjs :(
also I was promised more toga parties by popular media
I was at a crossroads, dude. Like, do I wanna eat chicken McNuggets or talk about my feelings?
There will be bowls smoken and not a single fuck will be given.
Randomize
