I was hooking up with him in my car, he wouldn't stop with my nipples, I had to literally beat him off of me. He kept groaning too while he was doing it. Sick.
Mommy issues
I'm currently trying to figure out how I woke up naked and handcuffed to my bed. Not real worried about class right now.
I thought he was kidding when he said pretend to be a dunkin donut delivery women. This is the last time I ever role play.
There's a hand-carved wooden bong in my backpack, and i really wish i could remember last night now.
He told everyone he was freezing their keys so they couldn't drive drunk. When I opened the freezer this morning, my keys were at the bottom of an unfrozen ice cream tub of vodka.
THAT DOESN'T MEAN YOU SHOULD LET ME CHUG VODKA.
I was so drunk. I apparently did a flip over the balcony using it as monkey bars. Ya I hurt a bit today
For the first time in my life, I paid for my own alcoholic beverage last night. Am I getting ugly?
To be honest, kinda.
pretty sure I called you last night to sing Hebrew to you.
Because I can't get laid, I'm day-drinking and hunting squirrels in the backyard. You can take the girl out of Montana...
And really all I wanted was to be like "hey can I borrow your dick for a few hours this weekend?"
i miss freshman lecture halls much harder to take shots in a class of 20
No Bryan wants to get drunk, rub inappropriate dudes legs, talk about my vagina and send me pics of his boomerang dick. That's not how you watch basketball.
That's how he does EVERYTHING!
Omg last night I was giving shots out like I was the Willy Wonka of the alcohol world.
Do you think showing up at his door with bourbon and chicken is too forward?
Randomize
