Now that I've come to graduate college. I realized the only discernible skill I learned was how to roll a joint properly. go me.
Well thats $24,000 well spent.
there's unknown territories my dick was not made to discover
I think im drinking tonight later on...which is good cuz i walked pass the liquor aisle the other day and i swear i heard a kid call me a pussy
I lost a little respect for your boyfriend when I learned that he has a scar from a Cheerio.
I just hit the bong during the whole bday song then blew the candles out with my exhale.
It's not my fault you have a job and can't get drunk on Tuesday's. Don't take your frustrations out on me!
I dont even think your gonna like what I got you for christmas. If not we can take it back and get drugs.
Holy fucking shit the worst thing for a hangover ever--A FUCKING BOLLYWOOD MOVIE BLARING IN CLASS
I'm almost too old to be on The Real World but feel like I'm too young to be on The Bachelor and I'm just really confused with my place in life.
He just ranted to some customer about fourth of July being ruined and I just shouted USA the whole time in the background. It was kinda epic
"I licked someones beard, because I can."
Just had to break it to that one guy that I can't sleep w him bc he looks identical to my brother. So how's your morning?
I asked him to have birthday sex with me via xbox live
When was the last time you got laid?
When was the last time you came home sober?
touche
thanks for the bj man. also make sure you close the gate behind you. the chickens are out.
Randomize
