Gayer than 8 guys blowing 9 guys
wow, that really makes you stop and think.
Her tattoo has the intellectual profundity of snakes on a plane except you can't laugh.
i forgot beer had calories. that would explain alot.
I am so hungover and cant move but craving a Wendys frosty so bad. I might have to watch 2 girls 1 cup just to settle the urge
I wish I could just thrust my cock straight into her new relationship.
not sure how we got back down, broken rib says we didn't use stairs
I got laughed at by a homeless guy in a Daniel Boone hat. I have no clue what this means for my day
It just makes me feel nauseous. And I don't want to feel nauseous when all I really want is to get off.
I WANT PIZZA BUT I ALSO WANT SELF ESTEEM
BUT LIKE WHO AM I TO EVER CARE ABOUT SELF ESTEEM
His roommates came in the room and were throwing snowballs at us while we were hooking up.
When the dude you brought home from the bar on Thanksgiving leaves before you wake up ... #thankful
Wtf is this place? I don't see any alcohol and I feel like we were supposed to bring our own strippers.
but dude how did I get so drunk?
Pretty sure it happened right after you poured a shot of Wild Turkey into your Budweiser, chugged it, and screamed "I. NEVER. BACK. DOWN!"
So...a chick sucked my crank...now her dog is licking my feet. I feel like a pharoh on vacation.
Dude if I had a dollar for everytime she asked me to do weird shit with her when we were fucking I'd have like 4$
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