i am watching brooke knows best right now and hulk is totally dating his daughter's look a like. it is gross and disturbing.
the most pressuring question is, why are you watching brooke knows best?.
Question: why is there a dildo glued to my kitchen table?
he actually used the line "do you have a map, because i'm lost in your eyes" and i was to drunk to care
All I know is I woke up next to her beside the toilet
He was sitting at the table eating ice and said, "I'm pretty sure everyone in my family has nipples."
I should go buy the economy size box of condoms and sprinkle a path like rose petals to my bed... Think he'd get the hint?
I am pretty damn sure that neither my body or his body is ready for how drunk I am getting tonight
I rolled over and my thoughts became words and I said "oh fuck not you again" he didn't think that was too kind and asked me to leave
I just started talking about my sextoy because I wanted things to be normal again.
I found one of your hair extensions on the dance floor. You put it back in your hair
If you get laid dressed as my dad that makes me extremely uncomfortable
THE COP WHO TOOK MY MUGSHOT LAST NIGHT JUST ADDED ME ON FACEBOOK
If I ever drink whiskey again make sure I don't eat the plastic cups that I'm drinking them from.
I am listening to my ipod while i puke, this is most entertaining hangover i have ever had.
The last thing I remember saying was "Tequila for all!!"
If you count the sounds from the room down the hall....that was definitely NOT the last thing that came out of your mouth.
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