I was at the bar last night dancing, puking in a trash can, and ordering another drink all at the same time. Have I lost my dignity?
haha no as long as you did hook up with anybody after that.
... oops
Anthony wouldn't know good sex if it sat on his face
love makes seman taste better
we seriously had to hang a plastic bag on his ears so he could throw up right into it.
good news. it is gonna rain tomorrow so now I don't have to pay to clean the puke off the side of your car.
She started acting like she was actually a deaf person...so I went along with it and acted like her interpreter. I don't think anyone bought it.
Apparently as I was doing the walk of shame home my dad's date was on her way to hers. hoes come in all ages these days
At what point in my life did a night that has strippers, belly dancers, tequila and a midget become "average"?
so hungover ... i gave my nephew five bucks to go blow bubbles for an hour in the kitchen.
The silhouette of his dick looked like an eagle. Amurrican.
You Just stopped dancing, looked at me and said "I'm gonna make it rain" Then shook the open box of crunch berries everywhere.
I know we said we never would. But try fucking a fat guy. He put in so much more effort and then made me waffles.
Please make sure you have solid number of friends around you that wouldn't be afraid to break a bottle and stab someone. If you're planning on drinking all of that, you're going to need a safety net.
she walked through the crowd, completely naked, slapped a pool attendant in the face and stole the towel he was carrying. she used it to dry her hair.
Do you remember vividly describing the shape and girth of my cock to that girl last night?
Randomize