Mind blown. Apparently, it's PRErogative, not PERogative. I blame Bobby Brown.
He has a chalkboard tally in his bathroom of "Me vs. Toilet". He's losing.
I don't think a check that has "thx for the drugs" on the note is really gonna fly.
guess who's eating a vending machine cheese danish, has no panties on, and is still the classiest bitch at this bus stop?
Just watched an entire Mariachi band walk of shame home together. Halloween at its finest
MORE IMPORTANTLY I THINK I JUST WATCHED SOMEONE GET SO LONELY AS TO TURN BISEXUAL??
all i've had to eat today is leftover bday cake and a shot of tequila.
welcome to college.
I just hooked up with a one legged Australian guy. Hooray diversity!
I would rather suck a dick or two than go there
You full on peed your pants then resurrected yourself like Jesus Christ...
Imagine how different my life would be if I could find a man who gave me more pleasure than pizza at 2am when I'm drunk.
There was already gay porn open on my laptop with a tiny carrot cake, a bottle of water, and a note saying "I love you, Sober Me."
Drunk me just hits it and quits it.
last time we tried to watch a movie together, we ended up having really aggressive sex. during the Lion King. so what Disney classic will we be ruining this time?
I sure hope so...I wonder if he could tell in that email that I'm really good at blow jobs. Hopefully he heard that tone. Any means necessary.
Why would you ask him if you could lick his chest?
He has a very lickable chest
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